Check me out in The Onion! /October 16, 2014 by Chris Duffy

Follow me on Instagram: @chrisiduffy

Every year, our tradition is to bring a giant deranged looking turkey piñata to our friends’ house for Thanksgiving. We change what it’s filled with each year. One time it was just a single can of cranberry sauce. This year, it’s essentials to survive as a parent / as a person in your late 30s / early 40s: dozens of packets of sleep time tea, a Costco sized bag of medicated cough drops, saline rinse for nasal passages, a Tide pen, hand sanitizer, and several low sugar snacks to keep in your car.