Jonah Lehrer recently stepped down from his post at the New Yorker for fabricating a quotation from Bob Dylan. The Wag was fortunate enough to get Dylan’s reaction to the scandal via Mr. Lehrer himself.


“Even I don’t know what I’m saying most of the time.” –Bob Dylan

“Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.” –Bob Dylan

“Truth is like a waterslide—only fun when it’s slippery and wet.” –Bob Dylan

“You want to know about creativity?  Just go out and buy that book Imagine by Jonah Lehrer. It’s only $29.00 in hardcover.” –Bob Dylan

“As long as you give my friend Jonah Lehrer a free pizza, I’ll write a song about your restaurant.” –Bob Dylan

“I’ll be selling tickets for my next tour exclusively through Jonah Lehrer. Make sure to pay cash.” –Bob Dylan

“If I could have any job in the world, I’d start out by writing a blog on”  –Bob Dylan

“Every writer at the New Yorker is smarter than me.” –Bob Dylan

“I’m a good friend of Jonah Lehrer’s. You should go on a date with him.” –Bob Dylan

“Any real Bob Dylan fan would sleep with Jonah Lehrer.” –Bob Dylan

“If you want to know how to please a woman, just talk to a neuroscience major from Columbia.” –Bob Dylan

“If you ever tell anyone about Jonah’s sexual dysfunction, I’ll never play music again.” –Bob Dylan

“It takes a true man to cry.” –Bob Dylan

“It wouldn’t kill you to stay the night anyway.” –Bob Dylan

“Go on, now, go. Walk out the door. Just turn around now, ‘cause you’re not welcome anymore. Weren’t you the one who tried to hurt me with ‘goodbye?’ Did you think I’d crumble? Did you think I’d lay down and die? I will survive.” –Bob Dylan

“Just a reminder, if you tell anyone about what happened with Jonah last night, I’ll destroy all of my writing and never play music again.” –Bob Dylan

Originally published in Wag's Revue: